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For 9 Years I Sat in High Holiday Services With Pain in My Heart

At 29, Kate Lauzar sat in her grandmother's shul with her family on Rosh Hashana and thought: "Barren: That's what I am."

 

It's hard at any time of year to want so desperately to have children and have your body refuse to cooperate.

 

But the holiday season has a tendency to amplify our insec

 

urities, especially those connected with family. 

 

"As others were praying, I was bargaining with God," writes Lauzar. "'I’ll try to be better. If only you will give me this, I will be a better person, more loving and compassionate and generous.' And I pray some more. For courage. For strength. To find more kindness and less envy."

 

READ MORE [Kveller]

 

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